Category Archives: Life Ish

When Drinking Gets Drunk

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So the other night, I decided to let my hair down a bit and give into the temptation of going out for lots of some drinks and good times with friends.

going outThe fun was out, the music was pumping and liquid was flowing.

shotsTowards the end of the night we all decided to head out a bit early to beat the crowd and also to attempt to be somewhat responsible and get some sleep to get back to our adult lives. *insert finger twirl here*

On the way outside, we noticed a young man sitting outside the bar on the ground throwing up.

awkwardWHERE WAS THIS MAN’S FRIENDS? WHERE WERE THE BOUNCERS? THE POLICE? JESUS??

Poor drunk ass fellow was just face to concrete yakking his life away and no one was there to help him out but the sounds of Rihanna‘s voice telling him to ‘Pour it Up’. I think he’s poured enough, Ri-Ri.

This incident made me start to think of past times where I was out drinking with friends and alcohol got the best of us. Oh yes, alcohol tends to do that to you sometimes.

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The Plan.

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normalSummer is almost here and that means:

My birthday is coming up. And Soon.

And while I should feel like this:

crying2I actually feel like this:

chewing2The “OH MY GOD I’M ONE MORE YEAR CLOSER TO THIRTY” hasn’t hit me yet. Really and truly, I don’t know if it ever really will–I have some time to change my mind though.

freaking outSure, sometimes I joke that I’m getting old as dirt, my hip hurts, or that I will end up in my future great-grandkids History book but my “closer to thirty” panic isn’t the typical “closer to thirty panic”.

I don’t freak out about “The Plan”.

What is “The Plan” exactly?

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Pet or Not To Pet?

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puppyBeing in midst of the quarter-life crisis, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about starting a family of my own and bringing in a little one.

That’s right, I’ve been thinking about getting a pet.

WHAT?! You didn’t think I was talking about kids did you?

kidsI don’t know if I’ll ever be ready for kids, but definitely getting a pet has been circling in my mind a lot.

Growing up I wasn’t allowed to have a pet. ANY PET WHATSOEVER. One day I brought a butterfly home and my pops flipped shit two miles from Sunday and demanded I let it go because pets “didn’t belong inside of the house”. I think he was moreso upset at the fact that my butterfly wasn’t helping out with any bills and living rent free.

Also he probably didn’t want the thing to die considering I didn’t know any better.

Now that I’m older, won’t kill my pets and in a space of my own the option to get a pet is now available.

And considering pretty much all of my friends have at least one, in particular dogs, puppy fever is at an all time high.

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To My Mothers….

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Happy Mothers Day to all of my moms out there!

My mind is constantly on RUN and I wanted to just sit down and really take a moment to pause and think about all of the women, moreso the mothers in my life that have influenced me.

And honestly, I almost didn’t do this post because just thinking about it got me extremely emotional.

But what I’m learning more and more as I go through this insane journey that is life is that you embrace where you come from, and you let it make you better–not bitter. It’s still a task that must be accomplished for me. And also what I find out in the end is that what you think you’re going through, went through and/or dealing with–someone else out there has been through the same or worse. Remember, it could always be worse. The movie Precious really brought that theory to life–the whole time while watching I just kept thinking, “Damn, I thought my mother was bad”.

Since your writing should be your truth and your truth should be your writing, I’ll go on record and say I don’t have a good relationship with my biological mother. In fact, it’s non-existent.

I am a believer in “never saying never”, so I won’t say that this current situation will stay the same. But for right now it’s for the best–mentally moreso than anything else.

I spent only a small part of my childhood with my mother–some parts I remember like it was yesterday, other parts I do not. I was seven and already at my third school by the time I moved in permanently with my grandparents, my mom’s parents, and started off another chapter in my life under their care and the care of my father. My dad owned his own business so his time was pretty limited although he always made an effort to spend time with me or give me a phone call.

At that age I wasn’t able to fully understand why I was moved or why my mother wasn’t around much. Eventually the truth became obvious as I got older and we grew further apart due to lack of emotional connection, her mental state and our desires to live on different tracks as far as life is concerned.

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BYE FELICIA!

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“Bye Felicia”:  When someone says something that you really could give two shits about—their name then becomes “felicia”, a random bitch that nobody is sad to see go. They’re real name becomes irrelevant and instead, they now are “Felicia”.

Everyone has their signature catchphrase that they have or they’re known for. I think I have a few of them but the one I am most known for lately with people that know me is calling out Felicia.

Now everyone seems to do it. Because it just works for shit you just don’t have time for.

sb

I’ll always have time for Sweet Brown, but the Felicias of the world have got to go.

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For Better or For Worse

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Growing up, I lived in a pretty strict household. Actually, even once I was grown (at least in the eyes of the state), I lived in a pretty strict household. And I do mean strict. I was the bitch at 25 racing home to beat a midnight curfew.

Like I said, strict.

Now despite all of that, I am thankful and truly blessed for my upbringing–I could not have dreamed of better people to have raised me and help me become everything good in me that I am today.

But like a bird, eventually you must fly out and explore your own path. So that’s what I did.

And now after almost a year into my journey, things recently came to a screeching brake slam upon being asked to move back home.

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I’m known sometimes to pop off at the mouth before thinking and not giving the classiest of answers, so before giving a clear one, I really had to sit down and put some thought into this shit.

Moving back home would be awesome to have more money to spend on pointless shit be more responsible and save money, but when everything is said and done I would be giving up the life I’d come to know in the past year…..

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Chasing Dreams.

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Apparently Ray Charles did my hair that day.

Apparently Ray Charles did my hair that day.

Since I was a kid, I always knew I wanted to be a writer and have my hands on anything that could get me being creative and allow me to put my own spin on things, from writing to sketching my own designs to running around making up incidents then going to my family and my dolls to interview them about it. Barbie gave the best responses.

barbie

I also thought at some point I would be a part-time doctor and moonlight also as an ice skater….those two didn’t work out so well upon realizing that the thought of school for over four years made my stomach hurt and that I am also a fucking klutz.

ice fall

Thankfully writing seemed to stick–it’s my outlet, my grounded place so to speak–to sit down and create a whole new world that I control and to be able to sit back and look at the finished product that can eventually be shared with people is a feeling I will never get over. It’s the true definition of a natural high to me.

Now that I’m old as fuck older, I’m finally starting to really put my work and thoughts out there and actually put effort into pursuing my dreams of putting a stamp on the world of entertainment. Less partying/hanging out, more energy put into writing, building and networking. Eventually it will pay off.

Recently I got the wonderful opportunity to interview two of the cast members of the new show for Direct TV, Rogue, starring Thandie Newton, Joshua Sasse, and Leah Gibson. Why on earth was my goofy ass picked to cover this event is beyond me, but I didn’t want to mess up. I studied, I researched, prayed, everything I could do to make sure when I walked in the door I was prepared. Because no one wants to be THAT PERSON.

tumblr_mi4agjoU411ql5yr7o1_400After shaking off some nerves, I went in with my questions, managed to speak English and not nervous gibber, shared a few laughs, not drool over Joshua Sasse and got back some positive feedback once it was all over.

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I’ve had a few opportunities in the past to cover some things, but this one was definitely the biggest/most extensive thus far and certainly a driving force to keep practicing, keep pursuing and keep getting better.

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If there’s something you are passionate about, DO IT–pursue it and be the damn best at it you can be. Basically:

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And if you don’t get that reference, 1) Shame on you and 2) We’ll never be best friends and 3) Still pursue your dreams, go watch Mean Girls immediately and remember:

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Cotton Headed Ninnymuggins

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drunk elf

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!! Saying that I am glad December is over is BEYOND an understatement. I feel like the past entire month I’ve been on the go–my house is a wreck, I’ve been losing track of my days and my liver hurts. In short: I’ve been acting like a cotton headed ninnymuggins.

In fact, it seems like mostly everyone has been acting out one way or another over this holiday season.

-THE DRUNK.

autocorrect

Between the company Christmas shindigs, the open bars, birthday celebrations and holiday get-togethers, it is hard to say no to that little friend we all know as alcohol. ESPECIALLY when it’s free. You say open bar, I say two Coronas, a shot, three limes and can I add mozzarella sticks to this tab as well?

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The True Inner Demon

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Seven months. Seven productive, positive life changing months of being clean before I caved back in. No I’m not talking about drugs; I’m talking about something much, much worse.

The blue Devil in the flesh. Everyone can take a break from it here and there, but you can never truly stay gone forever. I have determined that it is simply just not humanly possible. It’s like my Aunt Jerry’s house–you go because it’s familiar, you stay for all the crazy people and when it’s time to leave you wonder why you keep torturing yourself and going over to that goddamn house anyways.

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