The Challenge: Coming Clean

food chartEvery once in a while, I like to change things up from my usual love of pizza, beer, cheese, cake, some sort of meat concoction,  and more beer and go healthy on everyone’s ass.

Call it a cleanse, a guilty conscience, a desire to want to live a longer healthier life, or just become more aware of one’s body. Fact is: You eat good, you feel good. And when you feel good, you look good.

excuse me girl

While physical fitness is important, it all truly starts from within.

And unfortunately, it can’t be done from a case of Bud Light and $5 large pepperoni.8a4fb7f0271779c3e2e08116003e3983

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Throwback Tales: Welcome To The Dark Side: Part 3

From the start of what turned out to be a crazy ride into the world of online dating—from creeps to plain ole NOs to “Hell Night” with Zac Efron to the too much too soon headache that was wine guy, all seemed worth it in the end by the time I finally met my new friend in person.

We chose to meet up at a bar/dance hall where upon my arrival I was greeted with a huge hug and then taken by the hand to pay my entry in and then to the bar for a drink.swoonMy new friend was already established as a good looking guy from his profile and talking online, but none of that did him justice compared to what he was in person. From his Midwestern accent to his bright Hazel eyes to his quick wit responses and sense of humor that scarily seemed to match mine it was safe to say I was smitten kittens. Shit: I was becoming. THAT. GIRL.

After talking about each other’s week and a quick dance we then went to meet outside with the friends of my new friend, where I was jokingly introduced as his girlfriend. It was funny, hopefully one day reigning to be true, and cute—mostly because I knew he was joking. If someone like wine guy had did it, it would have been creepy because trust he’d mean every bit of that shit.

old creep stare

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Peeve This: The Winter Edition

It is clear that everyone has their fair share of pet peeves and last Fall I came to the realization that the list of things that annoy me is longer than I expected.

Just when you think you’ve reached your limit, some new trend or new annoyance twirls in….and that brings us to the part where we welcome Winter.

THE WEATHERpolar-vortexThis whole polar vortex malarkey has really been whipping everyone’s ass into shape this season.

snow dayThe freezing rain and high psychotic winds and snow was cute for about 10.5 minutes.

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Throwback Tales: Welcome To The Dark Side: Part 2 1/2

Over the end of last summer, I decided to break out of my comfort zone and enter the world of online dating. After combing through what seemed like countless profiles of NOs and surviving a date with a guy that looked like Zac Efron that I will now only refer to as “Hell Night”, I took my exit upon the new adventure and somehow managed to still keep two potentials: my new friend and wine guy.

Although things with my new friend had stepped up via Facebook messages no move or other point of contact was made.

Meanwhile wine guy swooped in for the interest and insisted on seeing me again for a second date.im excited im excited2 Continue reading

Shade vs Reading

Real-Housewives-of-AtlantaI LOVE my fair portion of trash reality television, and Real Housewives of Atlanta definitely does not miss the plate. This season thus far has been an interesting one with Porsha’s divorce, Mama Joyce’s hatred for Todd, and whether or not Kenya actually did offer to “suck Apollo’s wee-wee”. I wish I was making some of this shit up.

On one of the more recent episodes cast member Nene Leakes brought along one of her friends Mynique to a group gathering where she was later then schooled on the fundamentals of throwing shade and reading.

reading

No, not that kind of reading.

ReadHunny

  • Shade: acting in a casual or disrespectful manner towards someone a.k.a “throwing shade”.
  • Read: To tell someone about themself, as in “Don’t do it bitch, I will read your ass”.

Bitch don't comeShade throwing and serving a good read–you either know it or you don’t. Personally it’s not something that can be taught, especially in the span of a few minutes and then be put up against almost the entire cast of Real Housewives of Atlanta–because chances are you won’t be ready.

However, let’s get with the Gawds and break this all down: Get your glasses handy because the library is officially open, honey chile.

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New Year, Same Mess

Okay, so almost full 15 solid days into 2014 and I can now say with confidence that I am still a mess.

A mess for my standards.

Granted, shit could always be worse.fc50l

I’m not really big on New Years resolutions because I’ve learned a long time ago they just aren’t for me due to the fact that I make all these false promises to myself and to other people only to fail miserably and/or get mad at myself.

I’m all for change and advancing to the better good but that’s something that should be strived for regardless, despite the oncoming new year.

Admit it. You’re tired of seeing it too.

“New Year, New Me”.

“No time for lames this year”.

“Switching it up this time”.

“About to get my sexy back. Y’all ain’t ready”.

shut up we don't care2014 is a new chapter, a blank one. I just want to make it better than the last book, but other than that I can’t make typical resolutions for myself for the new year and let’s break this down why.

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